Category Archives: Photography

MACHETERO As Avant Garde Musical


vagabond/RICANSTRUCTION photos by Sam Lahoz

vagabond/RICANSTRUCTION photos by Sam Lahoz

“Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainties.“
- Erich Fromm 

When i was writing the script for MACHETERO i used the music of a band called RICANSTRUCTION as inspiration. RICANSTRUCTION was a band that i had been working with for a long time. They were a band that made music with a Hardcore Punk mentality and infused it with Afro-Rican beats and rhythms, they mixed their brand of Hardcore Punk with Salsa, Merengue, Reggae, Be-Bop and Free jazz. They grew up in the mean streets of Harlem in the 1980’s so they threw in a heavy dose of hard-hitting Hip-Hop just for good measure. The easiest way to describe the way that RICANSTRUCTION made music was to imagine the minds of Bad Brains, Ray Barreto, John Coltrane, Pubic Enemy and Bob Marley melding into one.

The thing that attracted me to RICANSTRUCTION was that they were the sum of everything that had ever inspired them. They took that old Hip-Hop adage of “It ain’t where your from it’s where you’re at” and made it a core principle of their creative process. They took everything from where it was and took it somewhere new. This was something that i had always been struggling to do myself as a graffiti artist, as a painter, as a graphic designer, as a writer and as a filmmaker. When i begin to conceptualize a project the first thing i do is turn to music. i need a soundtrack for whatever i’m doing. It helps to form an emotional center that i can project from. Whenever i get into the creative process whatever i’m listening to invariably becomes a part of the genetic structure of what i’m creating.

RICANSTRUCTION’s first album LIBERATION DAY was a concept album centered around people struggling for their freedom, so it only made sense to fuel the imagination for  MACHETERO with LIBERATION DAY. As i wrote the script the songs began to seep into the cracks and crevices and fill spaces within the film that could only be filled with these songs. The music was going beyond inspiration for the film and beginning to shape it. Certain songs from the album insinuated themselves right into the storyline.

For the most part i can’t stand musicals. To me they are so completely artificial and overwhelming that they seem to over take anything else in a play or a film. Not all musicals but most. It’s not a genre i really like and as i was listening to LIBERATION DAY the script for MACHETERO was beginning to lean in that direction. i fought it thinking that it was just over excitement at having found a way to take something from where it was, as songs on a concept album and take it to somewhere new, as songs driving a narrative in a film. It felt like a good fit but there is always an inherent conflict in the creative process where all creators have to be careful and that conflict lies between the ideas and the ego.

That struggle is in removing the ego from the creative process. To think that you as a creator own your ideas is trap that needs to be avoided. Nothing is original and the creative energy that exists in the ether is simply channeling or filtering itself through you and your experiences. The ego would like to claim ownership over these ideas but the moment that that happens the creation becomes a reflection of the ego and whatever is being created suffers because ego is only looking to serve itself and art needs to serve something greater than ego. Art needs to serve as a connection. This is the struggle for every creator, how to filter the ideas in the ether that have chosen to move through you in an effort to connect with others without letting the ego corrupt those ideas. It’s difficult because throughout the creative process the question is always hanging over the creators head as to what is a natural filtering process of these ideas shaped by your experience and what is ego trying to claim ownership. What makes this even more complicated is that the ego is necessary in feeding your confidence, saitiating your belief that you can accomplish the task at hand. Keeping the ego in check in the creative process while using it to support you as you struggle to create is a dialectic nightmare.

The songs from LIBERATION DAY wouldn’t give up though. Incorporating them into the script kept on making more and more sense. It started to feel right and i started to give in but i needed to find a way to have the songs not just be breaks from the narrative in the film but be a continuation of the narrative. i continued to test them conceptually to see if it wasn’t just my ego coming up with something clever that it could claim. But the idea of these songs belonging to the script in MACHETERO seemed to absorb everything i threw at it.

Then the conception of MACHETERO as an avant-garde musical began to take shape. Throughout the film there are songs from the Liberation Day album that are cut into the film and the songs actually bring information into the film in the same way a musical would. The difference being that the characters aren’t stopping whatever it is that they’re doing to sing to the camera. The characters and the story continue in a way that is conventional with a straight forward narrative. i wanted to make sure with MACHETERO each and every one of the songs  being placed in the film move the narrative forward. On another level the songs juxtaposed against the images of the film shared more characteristics with the music video form than they do with the musical, even though the two are very closely related. It’s this strange hybrid of the music video and the musical that made up the idea of an avant-garde musical.

The concept needed to put to the test. Were the existence of the songs in the film just some smug little way of being clever for the sake of being clever or were they actually bringing something to the table? The songs began to inform the structure of the film and impose themselves into the narrative of the film. They essentially became a Punk Rock Greek chorus adding another layer of narration to the film. The songs allowed me to bring a historical and psychological significance to the characters and their actions that would have been much harder to do without them. These were the questions i was asking of this avant-garde musical concept.

The avant-garde musical was looking better and better and proving to be more resilient than i ever could have imagined. The Hardcore Punk Rock foundation of the songs mixed with Salsa (Breakfast In Amerika), Merengue (Liberation Day), Reggae (Abu-Jamal), and Be-Bop Jazz (Shithouse Serenades and Jihad Seeds) meant that it would be difficult  to absorb all this information which comes at you pretty fast. So i slowed down the flow of that information by placing the lyrics across the screen as they are sung to allow the audience to read the lyrics to better absorb the ideas behind the placement of the songs. The lyrics on the screen also allowed the audience to better understand the structure and the shape that the film had taken. It really was adding another level to the film that made the ability to communicate these complex ideas and emotions easier to understand. It really was driving the story and connecting and imparting information that would be difficult to impart otherwise.

Great songwriting has a way of condensing a story in a way that no other artistic form of expression can. The songs from LIBERATION DAY were perfect examples of well crafted  songwriting. Not4Prophet who wrote the lyrics (and played one of the lead characters in the film) really knows how to hack away at the superfluous and get into the heart of the matter. Joseph and Arturo Rodriguez who wrote the music in collaboration with Not4Prophet really know how to craft song structure so it that moves these stories forward. The songs acting as a Greek chorus narrated elements into the film that – had those songs not been there, would have to be incorporated into the film in some other way. Finding an alternative way to get that information into the film would have required an investment in time and energy as well as the extremely limited financial resources we available.

Working on a non-existent budget with very few resources  the avant-garde musical concept became not only a reflection of creative resourcefulness but also a reflection of production resourcefulness. This condensation the songs from LIBERATION DAY brought to MACHETERO allowed the few resources we had access to in terms of finances, time and energy to be applied to other areas of the film. Working within the confines is where creativity blossoms best. Without restraint creativity is like a spoiled brat running amok for it’s own sake. Struggling within the limitations is where resolve and resourcefulness can be tested and the uncommon solutions are found in the creativity that is harnessed against the odds. It’s in this friction of ideas and concepts and resources and finances that MACHETERO became an avant-garde musical.

This clip from the film is a an example of how i used the song Liberation Day in the film and is indicative of how all of the songs were used in the film.

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-10H

The Sun Does Graffiti


The Sun Does Graffiti by vagabond ©

The Sun Does Graffiti by vagabond ©

the sun does graffiti

it gets up

does shadow burners

on walls and streets

using the objects where

light doesn’t penetrate

as inspirational subject matter

and as the sun sets

the sun’s graffiti is buffed

by the oncoming darkness

- vagabond

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-XU

Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part 5)


Sacrifice Without Hesitation The Story Of Former US held Political POW Luis Rosa Perez photo by vagabond

Sacrifice Without Hesitation The Story Of Former US held Political POW Luis Rosa Perez photo by vagabond

Luis Rosa Perez is a former US held Puerto Rican political prisoner of war. He served almost 20 in US prisons for fighting to free Puerto Rico from the colonial relationship it’s had with the US since 1898. In 1999 a group of Puerto Rican political prisoners and prisoners of war were given clemency by President Clinton. Luis Rosa Perez was among them. Sacrifice Without Hesitation is his story. This fifth episode concludes the documentary web series.

In this final episode Luis talks about how his incarceration politicized his family and brought them closer together. He also speaks about how the FBI tried to get him to turn against his ideals and the fallout his family, friends and loved ones suffered when they felt he wouldn’t. Luis also talks about the value of his sacrifice in the ongoing struggle to free Puerto Rico from US colonial rule.

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-XK

Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part 4)


Sacrifice Without Hesitation The Story Of Former US Held Puerto Rican Political Prisoner Of War Luis Rosa

Sacrifice Without Hesitation The Story Of Former US Held Puerto Rican Political Prisoner Of War Luis Rosa

Luis Rosa Perez is a former US held Puerto Rican political prisoner of war. He served almost 20 in US prisons for fighting to free Puerto Rico from the colonial relationship it’s had with the US since 1898. In 1999 a group of Puerto Rican political prisoners and prisoners of war were given clemency by President Clinton. Luis Rosa Perez was among them. Sacrifice Without Hesitation is his story. This is part four of an ongoing weekly documentary web series.

Part Four
In this episode Luis speaks about his political development and how he felt like joining the clandestine armed movement came out of his ongoing commitment to free Puerto Rico from US colonialism. He also speaks about the ramifications of that decision and the hardship it brought not only to himself but to his family and friends. Despite the pain and difficulty of living in clandestinity and then going to prison for almost twenty years, Luis feels that it was worth it and if he had to do it all over again, he would, a thousand times over if necessary…

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-Xf

Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part Three)


Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part Three) by vagabond

Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part Three) by vagabond

Luis Rosa Perez is a former US held Puerto Rican political prisoner of war. He served almost 20 in US prisons for fighting to free Puerto Rico from the colonial relationship it’s had with the US since 1898. In 1999 a group of Puerto Rican political prisoners and prisoners of war were given clemency by President Clinton. Luis Rosa Perez was among them. Sacrifice Without Hesitation is his story. This is part one of an ongoing weekly documentary web series.

Part Three
In this episode Luis talks about his families struggles as he grows up in Chicago. He lays out the beginnings of his political activism and how he first became politically involved through doing anti-police brutality and anti-gentrification struggles at the tender age of 12. Luis was also took an active part of the campaign to free the Puerto Rican political prisoners of his youth Lolita Lebron, Raphael Cancel Miranda, Andres Figueroa Cordero, Oscar Collazo, and Irving Flores who were a huge inspiration to him.

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-WX

Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part 2)


Sacrifice Without Hesitation Luis Rosa Perez Part 2

Sacrifice Without Hesitation Luis Rosa Perez Part 2

Luis Rosa Perez is a former US held Puerto Rican political prisoner of war. He served almost 20 in US prisons for fighting to free Puerto Rico from the colonial relationship it’s had with the US since 1898. In 1999 a group of Puerto Rican political prisoners and prisoners of war were given clemency by President Clinton. Luis Rosa Perez was among them. Sacrifice Without Hesitation is his story. This is part two of an ongoing weekly documentary web series.

Part 2
In this episode Luis talks about his experiences as a political prisoner and how the prison system unsuccessfully tried to use that to pit him against the other prisoners. He speaks about maintaining his empathy and humanity in a place designed to strip a person of both. Luis also recounts his state and federal trials and how he refused to participate in them as a young man of 19 years of age.

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-WD

Sacrifice Without Hesitation (Part One)


Luis Rosa Perez - Sacrifice Without Hesitation by vagabond ©

Luis Rosa Perez – Sacrifice Without Hesitation by vagabond ©

Luis Rosa Perez is a former US held Puerto Rican political prisoner of war. He served almost 20 in US prisons for fighting to free Puerto Rico from the colonial relationship it’s had with the US since 1898. In 1999 a group of Puerto Rican political prisoners and prisoners of war were given clemency by President Clinton. Luis Rosa Perez was among them. Sacrifice Without Hesitation is his story. This is part one of an ongoing weekly documentary web series.

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-VY

New Year’s Covenant


God Is An Anarchist by vagabond ©

God Is An Anarchist by vagabond ©

new years covenant
(antifragile)

i take the noise within the signal

i want the fury and the sound and the tempest and the rage

i want the unpredictable

i want the unsure

i want everything they can throw at me

i want everything they think will destroy me

i take the permanence of spray paint graffiti slogans to the streets

and then the impermanence of it when they paint over it

and then the permanence of spray paint graffiti slogans on their fresh paint

to create a permanence of the idea behind spray paint graffiti slogans

like god is an anarchist and the root of all love is the hate of all greed

when they hide the permanence of spray paint graffiti slogans under fresh coats of paint

the permanence of ideas will bleed through a bit

and ideas like god is an anarchist and the root of all love is the hate of all greed

will be tagged in permanence in your mind

i want the spontaneity of it

i want the friction to spark and flash in the night

i shift my weight ever so slightly when they come for me

to make a correction an adjustment

i want to see their faces when it all doesn’t all go according to plan

i want to see their faces when it crumbles and fades

i want the dust and the debris to settle before i rise

from the plans they had for me as i grin from ear to ear

antifragile

i want my tragedy to cease being their comedy

i want the chaos of anarchy to order things

i want the empire of doubt to be decolonized from my mind

i want to finally put these wasted years to some use

to take these mistakes and make them shine like stars

and use them as a means of navigation

- vagabond

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-UU

Facing Death With Life


Me & May

Me & Mya

It’s Christmas eve all over the world but i have an additional reason for celebration today. On this day eleven years ago my life was changed but i wouldn’t know about how that change would affect me until about six and a half years ago. Even then in that last week of March of 2005 when my girlfriend and i adopted a four and a half-year old pit-bull named Mya, we both had no idea of much of an impact this dog would make on our lives.

Mya was abused as a puppy by a guy who kept her locked up in an apartment, never walked her or let her out and beat her when she made a mess in his house. She was rescued by a neighbor of the man who was abusing Mya but he couldn’t keep her. My girlfriend got an email about Mya from one of her clients who knew we were looking for a dog. i remember how sweet and how friendly she was with us and how more than anything in the world Mya wanted affection.

There was a lot of work to do with Mya… We were told that she was afraid of other dogs because she wasn’t socialized as a puppy and so she could never be around other dogs. When Mya and i  walked she wanted to attack every dog she would see. It took me a while to learn that she was attacking out of fear and not out of aggression. There’s a difference. It’s easier to deal with aggression that comes from fear. If you deal with the fear you can deal with the aggression. It took me four careful years and the help of my brother and his dog Cheyenne, a pit-bull mix, to finally get Mya socialized around other dogs. Mya and Cheyenne are best friends now and hard to separate.

Cheyenne & Mya

Cheyenne & Mya

A year after we got Mya she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She had a successful surgery and was given the all clear. Four years later Mya developed a lump on her right hind leg. We took her to the vet and she was diagnosed with a soft tissue sarcoma, another cancer. A soft tissue sarcoma is a tumor but a more difficult one to remove. Unlike a hard tumor this one was soft and gooey. Imagine a tumor like an egg, if i ask you to pick up an egg off the counter it’s easy. Now imagine trying to pick up the egg if it’s broken… Not as easy to make sure you’ve got it all. Mya went through two surgery’s to make sure it was removed. The she went through six months of chemotherapy, an infusion every three weeks for an hour and a half. She pulled through all that with a grace and an ease that amazed everyone.

Mya enjoys a ride in the Jeep with the top down.

Mya enjoys a ride in the Jeep with the top down.

A year almost to the day that Mya was diagnosed with her soft tissue sarcoma she was out rolling around in the grass of the yard which was something she did when she was happy but this time something didn’t seem right. i looked down where she was rolling and there was foam near her head. Mya was having a seizure. i screamed to my girlfriend and we rushed her to the vet. i didn’t even wait until she was out of the seizure i just scooped her up in my arms as she was convulsing and put her into the car. My girlfriend sat in the backseat and consoled her as best she could. As we drove to the vet she was coming out of the seizure and she looked frightened and confused in a way i had never seen before. It broke our hearts to see her like that. The vet checked her out but didn’t find anything wrong. Seizures in cats, dogs and even humans is not something very well understood. The vet said she it was possible she would never have another. We went home shaken up but happy that Mya seemed ok…

Over the next 24 hours Mya had three more seizures. What is known as a cluster. Something was very wrong. i recorded two of the seizures on video for the doctors to see and haven’t had the strength to watch them since then. We took Mya to a special hospital, the same hospital that dealt so well with her soft tissue sarcoma, to see a neurologist. They gave her an MRI. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor. The doctor told us that without an expensive non-evasive surgery that would cost $8500 she had maybe two to six months to live. Even with the surgery there was no guarantee that she would live any longer. We couldn’t afford the surgery. We still can’t afford it. The neurologist prescribed medications to control her seizures which were brought on by her brain tumor and an oral chemotherapy to try to slow the tumor’s growth and steroids to keep the swelling in her brain caused by the tumor to a minimum. These medications were going to give her a chance, a slim chance but a chance nonetheless…

But Mya is tough, for all her mushy desire as an affection hound, she is as tough as they come. Six months after Mya was supposed to be dead (a full year since her initial brain tumor diagnosis) we took her back to the neurologist and he was shocked to see how well she was doing. Nine months after the six months she was given to live Mya is still snuggling up to us on the couch to watch TV and barking at me to play tug with her and looking forward to her daily walks and demanding i play ball with her in the yard by barking at me to get off the computer. Mya is my new hero. i’m amazed at her will to live. Despite the fact the steroids are ravaging her muscles and have weakened her back legs and slowed her once cheetah like run to an awkward trot, she wants to live! But not just live, but live as she has for the last six and a half years of her life, going on walks and hikes, playing tug with me or Cheyenne or playing ball with me in the yard. Her strength is an inspiration to me.

Her determination to live on her own terms until she dies is a lesson that hasn’t gone unnoticed by me. As she fights to live her life with this brain tumor, i think of the abusive puppy-hood she put behind her, her fear of other dogs that she overcame, her battles with the other two cancers she beat and i’m humbled by the difficult life she’s had and the fact that she’s happy to be here trying to make the most of whatever life she has left. And i realize that that’s the lesson. She’s no different from anyone else. We all have a death sentence we’re going to have to face, and we need to fight for the life we want. It’s just that Mya seems to not care that she has a brain tumor that’s killing her and that her death may be coming sooner than it should… The real lesson may be that Mya’s fighting to live her life as she wants it because that’s the only way to face your death with any real courage… Happy birthday Mya… And many many more…

My girlfriend & Mya 12/24/12

My girlfriend & Mya 12/24/12

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-Ug

Forty Four


Forty Four Self Portrait by vagabond ©

Forty Four Self Portrait by vagabond ©

A few things you should know about me…

i want to be an artist… i am an artist but being an artist is to be in a constant state of creation… being in a constant state of creation is to be in a state of desire, so i want to be an artist… i don’t want a career… i don’t even know what a career is… i heard it has something to do with money… but i hate money, money can go fuck itself… it’s a waste of fucken time… it’s a hamster wheel… a greyhound chasing a mechanical rabbit while the big boys place bets… a merry-go-round they won’t let you get off and the dj only has one record and he keeps playing it over and over… besides i want to be good and the hate of all money is the root of all good…

i fear, fear…

if i wasn’t so talented i would have killed somebody or a few somebodies long ago… someone important, someone who has it coming, someone who knows they should die for the shit they’ve done, someone who went out of the way to make the world worse than it already is because they’re better off for it, that kind of somebody, the kind of somebody that when they’re killed the other somebodies start to get scared but not scared enough to stop making life a misery for everyone else… ok, maybe not scared but at least nervous… it’s a long list i keep and someday i’m going to write it down… (it’s not safe to do so now you can be arrested for that kind of thing and me and authority had a bad break up years ago and prison would only bring us back together – but not in a good way)

art is the process of me trying to figure something out…

i’m not that smart but i try… i only finished high school and only on the advice of my parents who love me. but i didn’t let it stick… i took m. twain’s advice and didn’t let my schooling interfere with my eduction… i stay restless, do my best not to respect borders between nations, claim no destination, although i have been known to check my baggage and claim it later… curiosity has corrupted the better of me. the other parts are wanted by the cops and the tax department but i’m doing my best and leading by example by ignoring them… hopefully they’ll get the message and give up one day… there are few floors that i will not sleep on for a sunset in another part of the world or to see the moon from another angle on this blue-green marble. what i’m trying to say is that i like to travel… my chosen name is vagabond – no it’s not legal and if i had it my way nothing about me would be legal, legality is for those who don’t know better. i’m not smart but i know better and i try… schooling is a building with walls and doors and floors and windows and labs and gym and cafeteria and an auditorium and a principals offices… education is an open road and you learn something every time you’re on foreign ground… sometimes you’re asked to show your papers or your passport or your identification… sometimes you get lucky and they treat you like a human being and they just leave you alone to wander and wonder… and without a set destination the journey can take you… as opposed to you trying to take it…

when i die play the mix tape i made just for the occasion…

i want a jazz funeral and a second line parade with um-ber-ellas and hired professional mourners to make it look good, to fill the street, but don’t get a permit, just take over the streets, encourage others to join in as you pass them by, invite them to partake in the joyful defiance of traffic regulations, but for god’s sake don’t tell them it’s a funeral, it’ll only confuse the proceedings… scatter my ashes off the coast of coney island, let me become a part of the ocean, let the riptide take me to places unknown… then take three rides ride on the cyclone. once to shake the sadness from your bones, a second to shake the melancholy from your souls and a third time just to shake the happiness of living back in… and remember me only when you ride deno’s wonder wheel at that magic hour when the street lights come up but the sun hasn’t dipped below the ocean just yet and the orange at the horizon fades to light blue and then to ink blue and when you reach the apex of deno’s wonder wheel look out toward the atlantic…

you may see me in silhouette dancing on the razor blade that divides the sea from the sky…
- vagabond

Shortlink: http://wp.me/p1eniL-Qe